Chesty Doubloons-Gunner’s Mate


Melissa 1Finer yet more sinister pirate’s booty won’t be found upon the seven seas. Our Ms. Doubloons has had the dubious pleasure of mastering the kiss of death. This sharp shooter carries gunpowder in her corset and bullet balls in her purse. A doxy of the highest caliber, she’s been known to lead a crew to victory when the frightened cannoneer becomes an undignified blunderbuss. A woman not to be scorned, a sorry fate awaits those limp and soggy sailors who dare to cross her. Legend tells of the salty rapscallions who’ve not made good on their promises—whether it be gifting to her a richly fine portion of their treasure and turning into mean and stingy misers, or declaring their undying devotion only to be found with some poxy tartlet—they beg to walk the plank over shark-infested waters rather than face the wrath of this treasure of a wench.